"Pointing out logical fallacies can cause feelings of insecurity in others and as such constitutes a SEVERE CRIME AGAINST BEING NICE TO PEOPLE."
I seem to have overestimated my own significance. This is rather surprising, because i already assess my circle of influence to be about five or six people.
"Ugh. What a day. I don't think it can get any more- (gets hit up the jaw by a bus' cargo compartment door) Okay, THAT i didn't see coming."
"Calling it a milestone would be too generous. Let's settle for 'inchstone', that sounds about right."
I've had Miracle of Sound's "Ascension" playing on repeat in my head all day. Not that i'm complaining. That song is f#*%ing awesome.
Self-promotion is so alien to me, that when i do end up needing to do it, it feels like i'm betraying something.
It's that time of the year, when i start thinking about migrating my microblog to a place more "hip". Somebody, talk me out of it.
Absolute indifference is both the Universe's ultimate punishment and greatest gift.
"I feel an immense consuming emptiness inside me." — "You're just hungry, aren't you?" — "...Yes."
Putting the little shrimp to sleep singing Miracle of Sound's "Little Sister". Best Dad Award candidate, methinks.
"So, who are you going to vote for these elections?" "The Party of Whores and Thieves." — "...Do you have any idea how little this narrows it down?"
I have a genetic defect which prevents my body from producing any fat cells. Before you get all excited, remember that it means i begin starving as soon as my blood sugar runs out. I can assure you, constantly hovering near the brink of starvation is not always fun.
"Someone's listening. Quick, say something smart!" — "I know nothing." — "...Nailed it!"