"I'm having a flu, so i guess i'll just stay home and rest-" — "Hey, if you're home today anyway, let's go there, there, there, there, and even there!"
Asking whether or not i can go on is not very meaningful. I always can. The only question is, how difficult for me it's going to be.
"The only thing that keeps me from collapsing right now is the fact that the floor here is extremely dirty."
The frustration you experience when receiving the "told you so" speech is merely a reflection of the frustration you caused, when he, who told you so, told you so.
Cons: It cost ~5% of my entire paycheck.
Pros: This is some REALLY GOOD PIZZA.
Verdict: I regret nothing!
Pros: This is some REALLY GOOD PIZZA.
Verdict: I regret nothing!
Well, this weather is not going to kill me, but that's the nicest thing i am going to say about it.
Tonight, everything that burns, burns! (Hopefully, in a controlled manner, and in accordance with the law and local custom).
"The worst part is, that you believe a sleazy huckster without a trace of honor or integrity more than you believe your own family. What a sad life you must be having!"
It turns out, calling someone a prick in their face is going to accomplish either of: 1) They will get offended and "never talk to you again" for at least a week; 2) Their respect for you will skyrocket. I tend to think it's a win either way.
"I don't want to complain — but if i don't, people will immediately assume everything is fine!"
When you win, it's always thanks to your supreme personal qualities. When you lose, it's always because the game is rigged.
"Alright, gentlemen! Our controversial project of most dire implications for National Security turned out to be too complicated and expensive for us to handle. What can be done about it?" — "Why don't we outsource it to an IT firm?" — "...BRILLIANT!"
Watching your own living blood play under a microscope at x1800 magnification is a remarkably profound experience i can definitely recommend to anyone.
Contrary to most of my peers, i'm not in the slightest religious about eating or avoiding meat; But this slab of deceased bird is merely slightly charred, with no spices, no herbs, no sauce and no taste to speak of. I'm sorry to say, but this chicken has died in vain!